I Can’t Bare It!

As I mentioned in my last post I started a new job this week so I’ve decided to use that as a convenient reason to not write this week. That and the amazing wedding B & I went to and shot this weekend for our dear friends Leslie & V. We have tons of BEAUTIFUL footage! I can’t wait to start the editing process. Unfortunately there is just not enough time in a week to do it all. But have no fear! Mom has come to the rescue! (Wipes sweat off brow.) Today I present a fun little tid bit on grammar, everyone’s favorite subject, written in my mom’s witty style. I promise you will enjoy it! Really. Would I lye to you?  

I CAN’T BARE IT!

If you’re like me, the title would have made you cringe. There are few things as disturbing to an avid reader as the misuse of words.

Call me Gramma Grammar Cop. Before you call me out on my perceived misspelling, may I point out that Gramma, like NaNa, Pop-Pop, Nanny, Granny, etc., is a proper name and the phonetic spelling of grandma as spoken by little mouths.

I recently read a book which had the elements of suspense, great characterization, interwoven plot lines and a dynamite ending. I would have enjoyed it, had I been able to cruise past the jarring walls thrown up by common grammatical errors any good editor should have picked up on. You know what I’m talking about. Here are some examples:

“I can’t bare it!” Whatever it is you can’t bare, probably should remain covered up. If the burden is too heavy, then you might not be able to BEAR it. Yes, bears live in the woods, too, but there are sometimes two or more different meanings for one spelling of a word. Welcome to the English Language.

Their they go, getting there knickers in a twist again. And they’re hair is a mess, too. My teeth hurt from grinding. Do you see the problem here? “There” is how you spell it when you mean over there. “Their” means it belongs to them. “They’re” is short for they are.

Yesterday, I seen a billboard with a gross misspelling. Ouch. I SAW it. I HAVE SEEN it. See the difference? “Seen” is not the past tense of see unless it’s used with the helper word “have” or “had”, depending on the meaning you want to convey.

I do not loose my keys, unless I’m setting them free. When I lose them, it’s usually not with the intent of liberating them.

I am no techno-phobe, but one disservice technology has given us is the auto-correct function. It just turned the correct use of “they’re” to “there”, as I typed it. The challenge is to catch it in the act and nip it in the bud, or, use an extra set of eyes to catch it later. That’s called editing.

I’ve been guilty of letting some of these typical errors lie in wait for the unsuspecting grammar cop to find, so I don’t feel badly about airing my opinions here. Sometimes two sets of eyes don’t catch the little devils. It’s when an entire document, or book, as in the case of the one I labored through, is fraught with these little trip-ups that Gramma Grammar Cop is ready to tare her hair out. Oops. “tear”.

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